Today is pretty big day in my book. It’s my fifth year of sobriety.
To me, this is huge. I love celebrating milestones, and this one feels exceptionally important.
I’ve shared my story on this blog before, and if you’re interested, you can read about my experience here. I won’t bore you with the details, but the quick and dirty version is I was a hopeless, completely depressed person who drank all the time.
By 31, I had basically drank every day for a decade. I had numerous medical scares and finally realized I had to quit.
That day was August 5, 2011. I had my last drink and asked for help.
In a lot of movies, that is where the story of recovery ends. The person realizes they have to stop drinking, then it cuts to a montage of them going to rehab and meetings, and then fast-forward to a year later when they are happy and healthy.
Well, in those times between asking for help and being happy, there is a lot of growth that has to happen. Sometimes painful, sometimes hard, but I can honestly say, completely worth it.
You aren’t going to find me preaching about how everyone should stop drinking. I firmly believe some people can drink normally.
However, for those of us who drink differently, stopping is essential. We can’t drink in moderation. It’s an obsession, and to live a full life we have to let that part go.
For me, sobriety has opened doors to a life I have always dreamed of, but didn’t think was possible.
I have an amazing marriage, my relationship with my step kids and family is beautiful, and I have a job I really enjoy.
My husband and I say my sober years have been like dog years. The amount of growth I have experienced in one year is like seven. Since I got sober, we’ve traveled, I’ve completely changed my health, and I have rebuilt my self-confidence.
Today is about how good my life is now, but also a celebration that even when times weren’t so great over the past five years, I resisted the temptation to drink. I cried, and at times I screamed, but I got through everything without taking a drink. Not a sip.
Because breaking up with alcohol was the worst break up of my life.
Inviting that past love back in, even for “quick drink,” means I absolutely would not be writing this blog right now. I wouldn’t have just had a wonderful day with my husband walking around our town, enjoying the sunshine, and being present in each moment.
There is no martini that is as good as the life I have today. No vintage bottle of wine is as amazing as living a life free of the obsession of alcohol. Every hard time I stayed sober is far better than a quick attempt to numb the pain by taking a shot (or four).
I celebrate every day now because my life is honestly that good. I just don’t celebrate every day with cake. Today there was cake. 
